Reader's Discretion Advised

I find it worrying that Devon's pupils would be blown so wide they'd almost blot out the whites of his eyes. I mean, come on. Surely you know how human anatomy works? The pupil can engulf the iris, but if it starts bleeding out into the sclera, you either got this demon-eyes-not-really-actual-eyes thing going on or you have a gaping wound in your eye.Another interesting thing is the whole touch thing, since touch isn't a special sense (look it up if you don't know). Ah, well. I suppose it's one of the "classical" senses and since this is fiction we always need to appeal to those.As we, of course, need to appeal to the classical elements...But it's good. Man, does this author know how to work up the intensity.It's nicely crafted for a serial and certainly does grasp your attention. :D