Reader's Discretion Advised

pre-read
DRAGON. PRINCE. PRIEST.

Some reviews make me feel :/ I hope it's at least okay-ish :/

post-read
The writing's a bit chaotic. Nothing too bad, of course, but it just feels like it could be a little tighter. Eh. It's not bad. Could be better, sure, but I suppose it's not bad.

I think it's odd because it switches between a more simplistic oral tradition sort of style and a more narrative style.

I can't quite get a read on any of the characters. They feel like actors in a play more than actual characters. Sure, they're playing out their parts, and they're not bad, but they're not totally believable either.

Shit also happens a bit too quickly. It happens to slowly, but also too quickly at the same time. It's quite an interesting phenomenon. The thing is, though, I feel like the story does have potential. It's rather juvenile, like it's told by a novice storyteller, so the telling is a bit rough, but the ideas aren't bad. Sure, it's overwrought in places - cringe-worthingly so - but hey, that didn't stop my AP Lit teacher from appreciating Melancholia.

It really is overwrought, though. Which, I guess, would make it a good speed-read; get through it as fast as possible cuz if you stop and think about it, it starts getting cringy. Problem is speed-reading is a bit of a bitch, though, since it can get so incomprehensible at times.

Okay. The kid thing: clearly the dad king holds no store by ceremony. He didn't marry; he had 3 different kids with three different mothers. They need a son from Hadrin. Why can't they just pick a mother? I mean, presumably, none of Halvar's concubines or whatever act as queen, so why can't Hadrin do the same? He and Mora are "joined" in a ceremonial and prophetic sort of way; not like it was marriage or anything (unless I missed it?). Even if they are to wed, would it really be so shocking for Hadrin to choose a mother? Like not take a concubine. Just choose someone to mother his child, with Mora's permission. Mora doesn't seem like the type to be all "no way." But then, that would be too easy.

Man. I really want Mora to top. He should be like, sweet in the streets and a freak in the sheets. And get all toppy on Hadrin's ass, and Hadrin be surprised, but pleasantly so, and not averse to it, despite the fact that he's (presumably) only slept with women in the past.

Aw, man. I don't want Mora to be an ingenue. By chap 3, though, this story doesn't seem like the type to challenge conventions. Maybe it's like Hadrin's dad: challenges some conventions, but sticks like a tapeworm to the ones it does stick to. So what if they're liberal compared to IRL conservatives? These peeps are still conservatives by nature.

What I also find hard to believe is that Hadrin doesn't have a gaggle of brats - or at least pregnant women - in his wake, especially if that Adis (sp?) guy keeps bringing him women and he sleeps with a different one each night. Statistically, at least one of 'em should have at least gotten pregnant.

Also, yeah, the world isn't quite complex enough to seem realistic. It's got enough that it's passable, but it's not quite as believable as it could be, either.


That worry at the end of Chap 4, about whether the people would accept a king whose consort was a man...come on. You got all the info in your favor. Surely you know how to spin it? Go on and on about the fulfillment of the prophecy for the sake of the world, and briefly mention Prince Hadrin's sacrifice for his people, but only mention that briefly and instead talk about how the royal family feels honored to be graced with this descendant of Mota, or some shit idk. There's a reason I don't do PR. But surely there's a way to spin it. Sure, people could start grumbling about why didn't someone marry someone else earlier, or some other shit, but again, surely they can spin that? Is the prophecy even common knowledge? Maybe the recently unearthed it, or in light of the earthquakes took it as a sign that the old stories are not simply stories but perhaps are rooted much more in fact than they believed.

O god this story is dragging on. Basically, a whole lotta filler and nothingness happens while "waiting" for the king to "allow the marriage" which would "save the world."

Priests who practiced bonding regularly often ended up taking the subject of the bond as a lover. <-- that's not creepy or anything. And the problem is the phrasing, really.<br/>
Followed by some overwrought bullshit. Gah. I paused. I started reading it instead of speed-reading it. Oops.

Gah. Reached chap 6 and I'm thinking this may be a DNF :/
The concepts aren't bad. The storytelling is. The minutiae also is. Its worldview is overwrought and naive. The prose is rather juvenile. That all makes it rather cringe-worthy. And there's no sense of plot, no sense of tension. Everyone's just biding their time. Nothing is building. If anything does happen, it'd be the plot equivalent of a jump-scare, which is a cheap scare, at least according to Amnesia enthusiasts.

Halvar king-man makes no sense. His motivations make no sense. His viewpoints make marginal sense. It's all rather bizarre.

Why is there stigma against homosexuality in this world anyways? Have I just gotten used to more liberal-minded fantasy as a default?


I mean, at this point, after all these earthquakes, you really think the populace is going to object to a homosexual marriage that would stop quakes? This is like the ultimate anti-argument to fundamentalist anti-gay stuff. You know, the whole "gay marriages never has affected 'traditional' marriage" thing? This is like the ultimate version of that argument: not only will this gay marriage not harm your everyday life, it'll actually better it. Would you really keep putting yourself and your family at the risk of dying just to stand up for an ideal that only really the King seems to be for anyways?


Idiots. Their way of announcing the prophecy sucks. It'll cause outrage. And it does.

Also, what the hell need does Hadrin have to be an ass to Aynwin? Because she's a female and threatens his big gay relationship?

Eh. I dunno.

Why is Aynwin such a harpy? I hate this trope in M/M, the evil bitch woman ruining everything for the gay lovers. Gah.


So. Medieval-y setting. Just barely have plumbing and such. And they know what strokes are. Okay. Sure. Pull the other one.


Gah the ending is such sappiness. Eugh.


The solution is pretty interesting, though. It's actually pretty postmodern of the author, but again, the presentation was meh and blah. So overall, this story was a solid meh+, since it did have a pretty sizable dash of potential. Still, the concepts aren't so ground-breaking or world-shattering that I think they're necessarily worth sitting through the prose.