Reader's Discretion Advised

...what a peculiarly informative story.
The narration is very...court testimony. This happened, for this reason, and X felt this way as a result. X said *blank* to Y, and they did *action*. etc.

At one point, I mused to myself this seemed very infomercial-y. Or documentary-y. "You can tell MC is not a tourist because ___." ...oookay. Thanks, but that wasn't actually anywhere near necessary info. Kind of cool to know, I guess, but it's getting in the way of the story, what there is of it. And all of the explanatory parentheticals. Yeesh.

Eh. I mean, I didn't hate it so much as was perplexed by it *shrug*

Thanks for the tour of the story, I guess, but I think I'd rather hold out for the actual story experience.

Still, I suppose it's an admirable first attempt. The plot does seem to be there, even if the execution left much to be desired.